Bootcamp Memories Department: Rx Author: Peter Era: 1978 Date: 01/02/05 I think most folks started out their Navy careers in a fairly enthusiastic manner - I on the other hand pretty much had a shitty attitude from my 1-1 day of boot camp. In boot camp, some guys took it into their heads to sing cadence songs while we marched (even though I think that's really an Army/Marine thing..) [Here's an example: "I don't know but I've been told... Eskimo pussy's mighty cold"... ad nauseum] - Anyway in the entire company of 80 guys we could only come up with 3 songs. So I started composing songs - it was great fun, I'd sing a line and all 80 guys would repeat it (sort of like a recitative in church). However, my lyrics would hardly have played well in church since my lyrics dealt predominantly with the scenario of our two company commanders sodomizing each other. That was pretty brave/stupid on my part as one of them was a Navy SEAL! - But somehow no one ever reported me.. And if you can imagine it... over the next 6 years, my attitude continued to get worse.

Ship's Library Department: Rx Author: Peter Era: 1980 Date: 01/02/05 Whenever I went to the ship's library - On my way back to berthing, I would help myself to all sorts of religious tracts from the stand outside the Chaplain's office. When I'd get to berthing, I'd randomly distribute them in people's racks. When they discovered them, they'd freak a little - assuming some thumper was trying to convert them... I think fucking with people's minds is what kept me relatively sane on the cruises.

If only there were women on board IKE? Department: Medical Author: John Era: 1982 Date: 01/02/05 Can you just imagine if there were females onboard IKE during our time? I give you my solemn word that I would've marched over to my detailer and requested reenlistment papers for a 20 year tour on IKE! Give me a break.....I still lie in bed at night dreaming of the many ways such a scenario would've played itself out. Oh, to be so happy at hearing those fateful words, "Underway". This in spite of the fact that many WAVES/WINS were a little rough on the eyes. Sure would've made those at sea tasks (field day, GQ, long lines waiting for everything from chow to getting a haircut)a bit easier to tolerate. John

CMZ Department: Supply Author: Peter Era: 1981 Date: 01/02/05 During Command Zone Inspections, poor S8 div was charged with field daying the main passageway on the mess decks. They would approach this by doing one side of the passageway, laying down brown paper and stringing a "Secured" tape and then doing the other side... what a waste.. I remember once, they were working on one side and the XO broke through the taped off area. When an E1 told him that side was secured, the XO read him the riot act. How do your think the XO's arrogance affected his liklihood of reupping? There was absolutely no need for the XO to spoil that guy's work... He could have walked around it like everyone else but he barged through because by God, he was the XO! - That might explain why he had to have a marine body guard everywhere he went.

More XO stories Department: Rx Author: Peter Era: 1980 Date: 01/02/05 We had one tremendous asshole of an XO I don't remember the guy's name - but it was during the IO. he would go up to the weightroom to lift weights and walk from weight set to weight set, glaring at whoever was using them so they would interupt their routine so he could jump in. This arrogant bastard ended up taking a set of dumbells back to his cabin for his personal use. The XO chaired a sort of board that met to air sailor's grievances. When it was brought up that he was depriving the rest of the crew of using these dumbells, he more or less said "tough shit - I'm the XO"

What Was He Thinking - Part 1 Department: Rx Author: Mike Garnett Era: 1981 Date: 01/06/05 I think this happened in Naples, Italy, but I’m not sure. Anyone who has ever been on a naval vessel knows that the hatches and ladders connecting one deck to another are typically very narrow, and very steep. To make it easier to move things from one deck down to another, the ladders have side rails that can fold down and cover the steps, turning the ladder into a slide. This particular night, one of our shipmates, a loud and boisterous guy from Boston named Pete, gets back to the ship feeling just a little bit tipsy. Thinking that he might have some trouble with the ladder into berthing, he decides to use those rails and just slide on down. Did I mention that these ladders can be a bit steep? Picture doing a cannonball into your backyard swimming pool without any water in it. As I recall, Pete spent the next several days lying in his bunk with a rather painful tailbone.

What Was He Thinking - Part 2 Department: Mar Det Author: Mike Garnett Era: 1981 Date: 01/06/05 When we didn’t have planes coming or going, it was not unusual for some of the Marines and/or Gunners Mates to take their weapons to the fantail and get in some target practice. We would typically be dumping garbage at the time, so the guys would use the bags and such floating along in our wake for their targets. This particular day, there was a Russian cruiser shadowing us. He was a couple miles away to our port side and back a little ways. As the Marines and Gunner’s are do their thing, one of the Gunner’s decides shooting at garbage bags isn’t any fun. So, he aims an M60 machine gun to our port side and back a little ways, and runs off a full belt of ammo. As I’m watching the tracer rounds, I’m thinking this guy is nuts. Though I’m sure those rounds didn’t even make it half way to the cruiser, he did alter course and give us a little bit bigger cushion after that. I never did hear what, if anything, happened to the Gunner.

A Little Luck Never Hurt Department: Mar Det Author: Mike Garnett Era: 1981 Date: 01/06/05 Here’s another fantail story, though I have to say that I did not witness it and have no 1st hand knowledge of it, but if it is true, you should find it interesting. As I said before, the Marines and Gunner’s Mates liked to use our garbage for target practice. The way I heard it is, one of them fancied himself to be a sharpshooter. So he waited until after the other guys had finished shooting so that when he fired, he would know that the splash/impact he was seeing was from his shot. As he sighted in on a bag of garbage, an arm started waving back at him. Apparently, someone had fallen overboard and had grabbed onto a bag of garbage to stay afloat.

It's A Bad Day Department: Air Author: Mike Garnett Era: 1981 Date: 01/06/05 This story is one of the few times while I was on the Ike that I was downright scared. One day I was up on “Vulture’s Row” watching the flight ops. This was nothing new since I made it a point to get outside at least for a few minutes every day. It didn’t matter where we were, what we were doing, what the weather was or anything. I just wanted to get outside and see the sun, clouds, moon, stars, whatever. Well, in comes an F-14 Tomcat, and as he catches the arresting gear wire, one of the missiles he was carrying falls from it’s pylon. I had been on board for a while by this time, but let’s face it, you just can’t seem to forget the training video of the fire on the USS Forrestal. So here I am, 20 or 21 years old, and I’m watching this missile skip across the deck toward a line of parked planes. Luckily it missed the planes and went over the side. I later learned that the missile had an armor piercing nose and that it literally went through the catwalk.

ORSE - pt 2 Department: Rx Author: Mike Garnett Era: 1981 Date: 01/06/05 CG upper level was the location of the plant coffeepot (one of those 50-cup Bunn pots). Now, I had tried coffee a couple of times but just never acquired a taste for it. This one night I had the 20-24 watch, and when the oncoming EWS came down, there wasn’t any coffee. He chewed me out big time for not having coffee ready for the oncoming guys. I pointed out that I didn’t drink coffee, and he rather adamantly told me to “look out for your buds”. So, from that day on, at about quarter after 11, I would dump whatever coffee was in the pot (even if it was full), and make a fresh pot so that when the 1st oncoming guy showed up, it would be ready. A couple of weeks later, that same EWS told me that I made a Damn good pot of coffee for someone who doesn’t drink coffee.