The Rest of the Story (part I) Department: Rx Author: Noodle Era: 1983 Date: 03/31/05 Brother Wags' story about Brother Cal wandering around Naples in only his shoes and underwear is a half truth--actually, Cal wasn't wearing any shoes. It all started in Athens, Greece, home of democracy (which was a really abstract notion to us in the service). Anyway, one morning at muster on the aft hangar bay only a couple of RM squids showed up. Someone got really torqued off and wrote everyone up that didn't have an overnight chit in. The Noodles were wandering about Naples in the morning in a hungover stupor when Dan Reinhardt gave them the news. They rushed back to the ship after they had another few beers and shots of Uzo (sp?) to find that Brother Dan was exactly right about some p'ed of khaki. So they all had to go up to see the Captain after being forced to put on "I LIKE IKE" lapel pins on by the MAA on the forward port mess deck. So reading the pre-investigation report, the CO asks the DO, "So, Lt. %@*# Sucker, is it RM policy to require overnight chits?" (2BCont)

Rest of the Story (part II) Department: Rx Author: Noodle Era: 1983 Date: 03/31/05 (In our last installment, half of the Noodles were up on the bridge where the Captain had just asked Lt. CoverMyAss AtTheExpenseOfSellingTheCourageousSailorsDefendingDemocracy AndEverythingElseThatIsRightAboutAmerica if he had a policy of allowing overnight liberty without a chit so long as they weren't on duty.) Lt. Cock%#$&@$ (sorry Peter, I know we weren't supposed to use any names) looked the Captain in the eye and replied, "No, sir, that has never been RM division policy. We have always required chits." The Noodles looked at Captain Opey and the seeing-eye dog and then at the 8x10 pictures with the circles and the arrows on the back of each and everyone of them, and then looked...and realized it was a case of blind justice. The Captain pronounced sentence of some fine, reduction in rank (suspended), and restricted liberty. Our hero, Cal, was now in what Brother Wags would call a "Bad Scene" unles Wags was drunk on Uzo(sp?) and had just stuck his hand through a glass window.

Underway, Underwear, and Underpaid (Part III) Department: Rx Author: Noodle Era: 1982 Date: 03/31/05 (In the last installment our hero, Brother Cal, had along with his Noodle brethren received a reduction in rank from Citizen Second Class to Citizen Third Class--suspended for six months--and had his liberty restricted which meant that he had to muster three times a day with the rest of the cons on the "Group W" bench and had to be back on the pig by six o'clock at night on the days he was allowed liberty.) Finally, the big day came when Brother Cal was allowed liberty in Naples where the Noodle Gang planned a summer outing in the family-orientated Italian resort community. So, anyway, the Noodle Gang planned a refreshing and healthful day of softball (BDB's broken ankle is a story for another day), sun, and a moderate amount of liberating adult malted beverages. The spot they picked was a long-since dormant volcano crater that the WWII occupying forces had claimed as a US military possession without opposition from the puppet government that had taken Mousollini's place.

Cal and the Volcano (Part IV) Department: Rx Author: Noodle Era: 1983 Date: 03/31/05 So anyway, the US military inherited this gorgeous park and built softball diamonds and a golf course on it after Mousollini accidently hanged himself downtown from that telephone pole. The Noodle Gang arrived at the park and promptly stripped down to their athetic shorts and athetic shoes. Being the economically challenged squids that they were, they only had one gym bag and placed all there clothes in there. Brother Cal, being a farm boy, also placed his shoes in the communal gym bag so he could feel the grass and vomit between his toes. Brother Cal quickly became overcome by the warm summer weather and modest amount of Budweiser he consumed and may have forgotten that he turned into a pumpkin at six o'clock or perhaps the guardian of the gym bag played a dirty trick--we'll never know. Anyway, Cal realized he had only a certain amount of time to make his six o'clock deadline or risk becoming a third class citizen. But how was he to get back to the ship in only his underwear?

Liberty Risk Department: Rx Author: Peter Era: 1982 Date: 04/01/05 I too, once narrowly missed being placed on liberty risk. As a 2nd class, I was due back at fleet landing (Naples) at XX00 hours. It was way past that time when my taxi rolled up to fleet landing. I hopped out and start arguing with the cab driver over the fare... There is no doubt in my mind that he was ripping me off but it was probably to the tune of only a couple of bucks... and if I wasn't such a cheap bastard - I would have ignored it... Anyway, the Shore Patrol checking us back in, intervened to quell the assault that was about to happen. In the process of dragging me away from the cab driver - he neglects to check my ID. By ripping me off those measly few dollars, that cabbie did me an incredible service - And unlike brother Cal, I did not end up on Liberty Risk. I think there's a lesson to be learned - If you're ever late... be it: a muster, staff meeting, appointment, wedding,... if you can cause a large enough ruckus... you may scate by with no repercussions.

Sailboats on IKE Department: Rx Author: Peter Era: 1984 Date: 04/02/05 If you ever looked in the overhead of the aft hangar bay (starboard side) you would notice 2 sailboats slung from the overhead. They were there when I reported aboard in '79 and I think they were there when I left in '84. Special Services owned them - and prsumably they were for the crew's enjoyment. I never once saw them being used.... We dragged those stupid sailboats all over the IO, the Med, and the Carribean - for God knows how many years (at least 4).

Rx Berthing Photo, etc. Department: Rx Author: Tim Palange Era: 1983 Date: 04/05/05 In that Reactor Berthing photo under the RL Division pictures, the guy in the foreground who sold cigarettes in Naples is Mike ________ (name redacted to protect the guilty) of RE Div. He had relatives somewhere south of Naples. Right next to him is Tony Lee. In the background facing the camera is Mike Mulka of RE Div. All reprobates of the finest quality. The photo of the Dosimetry espresso bar reminds me of what RE Div. did with our fan room on the 3rd deck near there...we had 2-3 TV lounges, various sleeping and storage spaces set up. The ship must have put on an extra foot of draft and a few degrees of list just from all the crap we brought back from Europe every trip.

Liberty Risk Department: Rx Author: Charlie Era: 1983 Date: 04/05/05 In the 83 Liberty Risk episode, 2 Noodles didn't receive the wrath of Clexton, Pete R and me. I was TAD to Safety then, so I had to put in a chit for only 1 overnighter per port. Jim Bacquet had warned me about the Safety Chief, an Aviation Bos'n Mate, the worst of both worlds. So I had a chit that night or went back to the Ike. That may have been the same night I went back with T-Bear and he didn't get up for watch, as previously mentioned. My brush with liberty risk occured in Lisbon in 81. Somehow, I became separated from Fred and Jim K and ended up at PJ and Major Mike's hotel. I suddenly remembered I had to go back, so I started staggering in the direction of fleet landing. A cab appeared out of nowhere and deposited me at the landing, late of course. Fortunately, the boats had been secured for rough water, so a lot of us got stranded. I ended up sleeping on the dock in my dress whites and reported to quarters, no questions asked. Then I hit the beach with the rest of the Noodles.

Another brush with Liberty Risk Department: Rx Author: Charlie Era: 1982 Date: 04/05/05 In Naples in 82, a bunch of us were drinking in a bar a couple of blocks up from the Piano Bar. I was drinking a lot of liquor and passed out in a corner, then puked all over my dress whites. The SP was about to drag me off when Chief Colpus stepped in and took custody of me. He asked someone to take me back to the ship, Pete W, I think. All I remember was being dragged back, but was saved once again from liberty risk.

Noodle House on VA Beach Department: Rx Author: Elmo Era: 1983 Date: 04/06/05 I have some good memories of the winter we spent living on the beach in VA Beach. We lived a block south of the Noodles. We had a Super Bowl party with Turkey all the trimmings, and lots of alcohol. I don't remember who won the game but I'm afraid to go back to VA because it was a rental TV that I never bothered to return to the rental company. I left it in the front seat of the truck I left in the back yard when we moved out. I also remember getting drunk and going out on the beach and having bottle rocket fights. The bottle rockets were brought back by the Noodles from their Sugar Mountain expeditions.